Sunday, August 23, 2009

Trust and Parenting

"If there is anything that we wish to change in the child, we should first examine it and see whether it is not something that could better be changed in ourselves." - C.G. Jung

Recently because of my road trip with my two girls and a sermon I heard last week, I have been thinking about parenting. The major theme I am putting thoughts under is TRUST. Why?

1. I notice that my almost two year old has the hardest time when her immediate needs are not being met and she does not believe that they will be.
2. I notice that my eight year old becomes obsessive about issues when she does not think we are listening to her or going to make sure her desires are met.
3. Both are crushed when we don't do something we said we would for whatever reason.

The list goes on but these are the highlights for me recently. Each comes down to a lack or trust or trust being broken. As a parent it is important for us to teach our children to trust. It was trust that was broken after creation when Adam & Eve gave into the serpent, and it is a deeper trust we are learning in the recreation. So we teach trust in a few ways.

1. We fail and are untrustworthy, so our kids freak. (There are ways that this can be used to teach).
2. We are people who value our commitments and words, and build a track record of trustworthiness (the Jung quote was leading to that)
3. We build in clear situations for our children where they are aware of how dependent they are upon the care of their parents and call them to trust us in caring for them.

Where are the places you have had to grow as a parent in becoming trustworthy? What is the volue of our children learning to trust?

2 comments:

stephy said...

This is rad.

michaelstevensrev said...

stephy,

thanks this is really getting some good things going in my mind. Most parenting styles are hard core how to methods, I don't subscribe to that and it doesn't seem Biblical.

This deals with the fall, who we are as people and parents, and who are kids are. I'm going to keep breaking it down and see where it takes me. Thanks for the encouragement.